S1E4

Aloooha!

Charging full speed... Like a seagull on the beach. Because that's kinda how life comes at you sometimes, right? One Sunday, you're at the tail end of your month of relaxation in between the mish and university. The next, your brother's gone to the MTC, your mom's come and gone (with the cat, I might add), you've moved up to Logan, and you've got school the next day.Yoh, time moves my friends! Enjoy the moments as they come and don't blink, because before you know it,  they're gone and you're on to a new chapter in your life.

I think one of the inevitable results of serving a mission is being prepared for a constant stream of people entering and exiting your life. Every time you get transferred, you're saying goodbye to people you've grown to love and meeting new people that you will once again grow to love, if only for a few months before saying goodbye once again. Up until your mission, things are pretty constant, though. You generally stick with the same group of friends, your family's all together, you live in one place, and life really isn't all that difficult. But I think mission is a little taste of everything that comes next. Finding things that are constant in your life becomes more difficult. It really teaches you to appreciate the little things that do remain constant... The friendships that survive the test of time, having a place to stay where you don't have to live out of a suitcase, and most importantly, family. We're separated for a season between three different states, but it's good to know that after a couple years we'll all be back together again. And with time charging full speed ahead like it has been lately, it really shouldn't be too long.

Spending a couple last days with Blake was the bomb, though. Between haircuts from Raleigh, golfing, dining, and making a whole Snapchat story out of it, we had some good last times. He's sure gonna do great things out there. 

So let's see... That all happened. There's been a lot this week. We ended up having to juggle some of Mama's flights around so that the cat could end up in Hawaii. That was kind of an ordeal, but he did end up making it there safe and sound! What else... The same day we dropped Blake off at the MTC was the day I ended up moving to Logan... So it was Syracuse to Provo to Syracuse to Logan all in one day. Hectic, but it ended up working out. Inheriting basically the whole pantry after your family moves across the ocean requires an extra car, so it was good to have Mama here for that. It's taken a couple days to get settled in, but I think I'm about there and it feels great. Went to the temple with Taylor, found a lekker Indian restaurant right close to Oakridge, ended up in Bear Lake with some longtime friends Saturday... It's been gooood times. I'm stoked for this school year to start.

I have a couple thoughts I wanted to share quickly and then I'll probably wrap up. Well, probably just one thought actually... Stewardship. I think generally we all want to be good people and change the world and what and what, but what I've seen time and time again is that it's extremely difficult for one person's actions to change the world in some significant capacity. But where each of us can make differences is in the lives of individuals. I believe that there will always be certain people... Not many, but certain people placed in our lives for a reason. Whether for them to help us, or us to help them, it doesn't really matter, but certain people that we'll be close to. We may not be able to change the world, but we can always be a positive influence to those we're close to. And it may not always be big things, but as we consistently and genuinely go out of our way to make small differences in our friends' and family's lives, brotherly/sisterly love will result. I made the three hour round trip drive to Bear Lake and back with one Luke Koenen (funny story with that...we haven't yet decided if it would be better to call ourselves 5th and 6th wheels to Dan/Kenzie and Taylor/Lauren or to just call ourselves Luke/Dallin...), and we had one of the most spiritually edifying conversations I've had in a long time. I mean it was nothing too big or showy or anything, but I felt like it put both of us in a good place. I dunno, I guess that's kinda my idea of stewardship. Watching out for and being genuine to the people you're close with. I mean obviously be good to other people too, but especially to those you're close with.

Looking back this week... My grandpa's an incredible example of this. On the drive up to Logan, he was telling me how hard it is for him every time one of his grandkids leaves on a mission. I was the first, and Blake was the fourth. He said it's gotten a little easier, but it's still tough. It kinda hit me how much he loves us. He definitely makes me want to be better... Especially to my own family members. He must be doing something right, eh?

Anyway, I should probably run... It's a school night (first in two years...weird), I've got a few people I still want to see, and a whole new chapter in life to get ready for. Luckily, I'll be doing this all in the first permanent home I've had in months and months. Hurrah!

Much love and aloha!

Dizzy

S1E4 Pics

S1E3

Aloooha!

Yoh yoh yoh... It's kinda crazy how much can happen in two years. Selfie sticks can be invented and subsequently banned from Disneyland. The sound a fox makes can be discovered and have a song written about it. Donald Trump can go from being someone people followed on Twitter for comic relief (even though he took himself seriously) to someone who's a serious contender to rule the free world. Give it another two years and we'll probably even find a cure for cancer. Perhaps we have it already but it's just hidden in Donald's hair... Not likely, but you never know unless you check. Someone should get on that. Anyway, my point is things can happen and change over two years. That includes people. Everyone's been on different journeys, learning different things, and reconnecting/finding out what people have been up to has been one of the highlights of returning home. Man, I have such cool friends. A wise man named Braiden Childs once told me, "The more deep conversations I have with anyone the better I feel. That's what brings me joy." Amen to that.

So I know I've said this before, but post-mission life is a roller coaster of ups and downs. Luckily, this week's had lots more ups. I should probably start by spotlighting my grandpa for doing something no one else has ever been able to. After years and years of proving to the world that it is indeed possible to golf a ball farther right than straight, he fixed my slice. After watching my swing on the driving range for a while, he suggested a simple pop of the wrist to change the angle of the club face when it hits the ball. And holy fetch, it worked! The rest of the day after that my shots were consistently going straight! Golf is probably the most bipolar relationship I have. I went from hating it that morning to loving it at the end of that day. Knowing how my luck goes, though, I'll probably have something else to fix next time I get out and play. It'll be good to keep Grandpa around. What a stud.

Grandpa fixing slice? Up.

I made it to the temple this week, and I think that's probably the best place to go for personal revelation. There really aren't too many places you can go to be completely cut off from the rest of the world, but the temple is one. It's peaceful, it's quiet, it's still, it's reverent, and it gives you the chance to ponder deeply and the Spirit a chance to speak to your most personal needs, whether they be spiritual or temporal. That's something I didn't appreciate nearly as much two years ago... Stillness. I've yet to find a better way to clear the mind and focus on things that really are important. Truly wonderful.

Temple? Up.

What else, what else... Eish, I'm kinda tired so I'll probably just summarize the rest so I can get a little bit of nap time in before game night with the grandparents. Basically between hiking Manoa falls, trying loco moco, a red eye flight, a wedding reception, riding bikes around SLC, Indian food, a blind date, game night at the Lows, a Real Salt Lake game (complete with free food, drinks, parking, and second row seats), and missionary homecomings, it's been ups all around.

People with surnames like Johnson, Cox, Tiem, Facer, Sargent, Coleman, Dalton, Fox, Emery, Stettler, Carling, Schwab, Granados, Washburn, Young, Harbertson, Allen, Low, Hafen, West, Fillmore, Oldroyd, Page, and probably more I've forgotten to mention? Up x23. (At least.)

I think I finished last week's post Sunday afternoon... The rest of that day and Monday were the last days the six members of the Johnson ohana would be all together for a long while. Which is sad, but hey... We've had a month of togetherness and it's been wonderful. At least we didn't miss each other by like a day or something. Tyler and Taylor, if either of you are reading this, haha sorry. Our last little while together consisted of hiking, Taco Bell, blobs, and pictures. Kiley hurt her ankle at school that day (had to ride around school in a golf cart all day...yeah, life is hard), so she had to sit out our last supper, but it's ok because we still love the crap out of her. But now that I'm back in Utah, the two year clock 'til we reunite has started all over again. Sure hope it goes fast.

Being away from family? Down.

But being together for eternity? Biggest up there is.

More changes coming this week... Blake to the MTC Wednesday, me to Logan later that day, and school the following Monday. After months and months of living out of a suitcase, I'm gonna have a home and a bed to call my own!!! H*CK YEAH!!! Couldn't be more excited or nervous. More adventures lie

Much love and aloha!

Dizzy

S1E3 Pics

S1E2

Aloooha!

I think I forgot to mention this last week, but I'm including Spotify playlists on these posts. Usually they'll just be songs that have been stuck in my head the last week or so, but occasionally they'll be a little more significant. It's Time by Imagine Dragons, for example, was the first song last week because I felt like Dan Reynolds nailed post-mission life beautifully with it. The Foo Fighters earned the top spot and episode title this week with their song Learn to Fly. A few weeks ago, about a thousand musicians got together and performed this song, asking Dave Grohl and the Foo Fighters to come play a show in Italy. Hundreds of drummers, hundreds of guitar players, and hundreds of singers got together for it. Their performance is something beautiful. Most of the people there I'm sure had different political, religious, and economic views, different cultures, and different backgrounds, and yet, for one brief moment, all of that was set aside while they did their thing. Amazing what music can do. The video can be found here. (A word of warning, though, after they finish the song, the video goes on another couple minutes and the speaker uses a little bit of colourful language!) The title is also pretty fitting to where I feel like I am right now... Making my way back home and learning to fly.

Ah, this last week has been great. Although I must say, living in Hawai'i is much different than vacationing in Hawai'i. I feel like when you're on vacation, you're trying to pack as much into one day as possible. But when you're living somewhere, you have a lot more free time. A lot more time to just sit back and relax. And this is especially true when you throw being unemployed, not going to school, and living with your parents into the mix. Coming right off mission where you're trying to be productive literally every single hour of the day, having this much free time is insanely frustrating. But I think just like it takes learning to be that productive, it takes a little bit of learning to enjoy the free time also. It's been good, though. I'm still on mission schedule even with all the time zone changes, so I've been up a little earlier than the other guys. Been able to get some good runs in and make some nice Spam and eggs. (We're in Hawai'i... How can I not?!) And then once the others are up, Blake, Biz and I have gotten a lot of pinball playing and How I Met Your Mother watching in while Kiley's been at school.

Speaking of How I Met Your Mother, I should probably mention this before I forget... It is insane how many life lessons you can learn from Ted and his friends. One that stuck out in particular to me this week was this:

"You will be shocked kids, when you discover how easy it is in life to part ways with people forever. That's why, when you find someone you want to keep around, you do something about it." -- Ted Mosby

Before I left on mission, I had no idea how easy it would be to lose track of people. But it's real. If there are people you want in your life more than just an accidental bumping into at a wedding reception or mission homecoming, you have to give it some good effort. Without it, most people will simply disappear into the sea of the rest of the world. I dunno. Hold onto those you love... I guess that would be the lesson to learn. Also, the love story between Ted and the Girl with the Yellow Umbrella may be one of my favorite love stories ever told. I included La Vie En Rose by Cristin Milioti on the playlist this week, since that's the first song Ted hears her sing.

Anyway, back to reality...

Great sibling and mama bonding time this week. We made it to some of the touristy stuff too. Pali lookout, Pearl Harbour, Hale'iwa, Ewa beach, Laie, Diamond Head... We should have made it to the temple too but there's kind of a funny story behind that. The man I used to know as Elder Gold (but whom I now know as Landon) invited Blake and I to go spear fishing Friday morning just outside his dorm on Laie Point. Since we were gonna be making the drive to Laie anyway, we figured we'd get a temple session in afterward too. So we woke up early that morning and packed everything we'd need... Snorkels and fins for fishing, church clothes and temple bags for the temple. We drove to Laie wearing just t-shirts and board shorts since we were gonna be in the water, but...perhaps that was a mistake. I realized about halfway through the drive that among the white shirt, tie, pants, shoes, socks, belt, and temple bag I had packed, there were no garments. I'm notorious for forgetting underwear. It's happened on at least one family vacation, and I guess now it's happened on a temple trip too. Since I had already tried going for a run while the sun was highest in the sky that week, I figured I didn't need to add "go through the temple without garments" to my list of terrible ideas I'd tried. So long story short, temple trip ended up not happening, but spear fishing was the bomb. Blake and I didn't catch anything, but Landon caught a unicorn fish that he ended up frying up for us. umNandi kakhulu.

I don't remember if it was this week or last, but I had a conversation with Elder Childs (eish... Braiden now), and we were talking about how there definitely is something real about being set apart. He asked me if someone came and told me to wake up tomorrow and do missionary work all day, would I be able to do it? And honestly, I'm not sure... I think I could drag myself through it, but I know it wouldn't be the same while I was set apart. Looking back, I have no idea how in the world we did that every single day for two years. No downtime. No vacations. Even on p-days, you're hardly relaxing. Are missionaries sustained by the Lord? By the millions of prayers coming from members daily all over the world? I have to believe so.

Well, I'm hopping on the plane tomorrow night back to Utah. Kinda crazy... Been with the family the last couple weeks, but with me heading out tomorrow, Blake leaving to the MTC in 10 days, and the fam bam living in Hawai'i, this is the last weekend we're gonna be together for for another two years... Here we go again! But it's worth it. The sacrifice is definitely worth it. Probably should wrap up and go spend some time with them. There may be plans to have a camp out on the couches tonight... We'll see how that plays out!

Oh! I've posted a link to an album of pictures from the Hawai'i trip if you want to check that out.

Much love and aloha!

Dizzy

Hawai'i Photos

S1E1

Alooooooha!

Well, it looks like I've been off the mish about three weeks now. And to say these last three weeks have been crazy would be the understatement of this dispensation. Yoh... Probably the last four or five months or so actually. The last time I had at least a semi-permanent residence was the six months I spent in Umlazi, and that time ended back in April. After getting transferred from there, I spent six weeks in Berea, four weeks in Thaba Nchu, two weeks in Durban for the PMTC, a week and a half or so staying in hotels with the parents while we toured Africa, a week at the apartment in Kaysville, a week with Blake and the grandparents in their new house, and now I've been in Hawaii with the fam bam the last week or so. And this isn't the end. After another week here, it'll be another week and a half with the grandparents before moving up to Logan for school. Don't get me wrong... The last few months have been absolutely incredible, and I wouldn't trade them for anything, but at the same time, living out of a suitcase really makes you appreciate the simple beauty in having a permanent place to set up base camp, even if conditions aren't grand. Remember that, kids.

Ah, so where to begin... Ok, maybe with my purpose in setting up this blog. Basically, returning home from mission has probably been one of the hardest things I've ever done. I'd been hearing from people for months and months that coming home from mission is hard and it's a big adjustment and blah blah blah, but I always just kinda brushed it off. I figured what they were talking about was adjusting back socially and figuring out how to have conversations with girls again without asking them how their Book of Mormon reading is going. While that is a legitimate concern, it's definitely not what people were talking about. And I realized that when it was my turn to head home. I landed in SLC on a Friday and gave my homecoming talk the following Sunday. For that weekend I was the spotlight, and everything seemed to be going great. I felt like I could still talk to people normally, people still remembered who I was... How was this going to be hard?! Well, after the party's over, reality starts to set in. Time hasn't frozen for a couple years just because you decided to do the Lord's work. You realize that no matter how badly you may wish it, life isn't going to be the same as it was two years ago. As you scroll through Facebook, you don't recognize a lot of your female friends because so many of them have different surnames. You see people that have moved away, people that have started families, people that have finished school, people that have careers... And you realize that as truly amazing as your mission was, in the real world, you're at virtually the exact same place you were two years ago. (This isn't taking into account all the real world experience you gain as a missionary, but that realization didn't hit me 'til much later.)

So the question that hits you like a ton of bricks is this: What next? Your only real option  at this point is to do something you've learned to do for two years straight: transition, get to work, and make the best of whatever life throws your way.

The transition was explained to me like this: the pre-mission you is person A, the mission you is person B, and the post-mission you is person C. Persons A and B are behind you, and you're trying to figure out who person C is. When you get off mission, you're likely going to want to be the closest thing to person B as you possibly can. Person B was great. Person B studied their scriptures every day, woke up and went to sleep on a set schedule, talked to everyone all the time about the gospel, bridled their passions for worldly things, and found an immense amount of joy in helping others to find an immense amount of joy. But you learn quickly that person B isn't really an option at this point. With so many real world priorities competing for your time, you find yourself slipping back into some of person A's habits you thought you'd ridded yourself of. Social media, for example. More on that in a minute. So you're at a crossroads. You have the agency to make person C whoever you want person C to be. In my mind, that would be taking the best parts of person A and the best parts of person B and balancing them out into a whole new person C. But that's the tricky part. Balance... I think there's a lot to that. Again, more on that in a minute. Shoutout to Kelsey and Tina Schwab for this analogy by the way!

Luckily, you're not taking this path to person C alone. Especially if you're in Utah. You're surrounded by people that have either taken the path themselves, or like you are currently on it. You'll find it really easy to reconnect with some people, and a bit more difficult with others. You'll realize that of your 1100 or so Facebook friends, there are some people you may not have any desire to reconnect with, but you realize that that's ok! Time is precious, and you want to spend it with the people that make you happiest. That's at least one thing you picked up over the last two years. So you do some reconnecting, and you find yourself roaming Station Park with people like Alexon Tiem, on the golf course with people like Ryan Francom (who you met a couple years earlier as Elder Francom, your first zone leader), or playing volleyball and habanero pong with the guys at Stephen Godderidge's bachelor party, and you realize that you've got a pretty awesome group of people around you. And after spending even more time with your family, you remember that they're probably the greatest people in your life. Especially after spending hours playing card games with your cousins, spending a week at the man cave with your grandpa, going to Warped Tour with your brother, and spending your first week at the new house in Hawaii with the fam bam.

So that's the reality I've been dropped back into. And making sense of/finding my place in it is tough, but it's good. It's a learning and growing experience. The Lord wants us to find balance in our lives. I learned this on mission, and I'm convinced more and more of it as time goes on. Balance between our passions and His will, balance between productivity and leisure, balance between justice and mercy, balance between most things. I remember back when I was a zone leader there was a disobedient missionary I was really struggling to reach out to. I talked to the Z Man a few times about him, and his suggestion was this: love him. Genuinely love him. Be his friend, and when the time is right, nudge him to try and be a little better. Find a balance between being his friend, but also not going off the deepend yourself. Elder Esplin (now Shandon, I guess, since we're both home now) suggested that finding balance in your life is all about choosing to use your time for the things that are actually most important. (We've also decided that life is all about settling... Choosing what you settle for. You have to settle for some things, but make sure you don't settle on the important things. For example, if money is tight, buy the no-name brand macaroni and cheese before you buy the one-ply toilet paper. Come on, don't settle when it comes to toilet paper.) So once you can figure out what's most important, the path starts to make itself clearer.

And that's the point I feel like I'm at right now. I feel like I have a pretty good idea of who I want person C to be. After some deep conversations with friends and family about the future, I've toyed with some lofty goals... Grad school and whatnot. I think I've got what it takes to go somewhere big. But as I started thinking about it, I asked myself... What do I want in life? What do I really, truly want? Happiness, obviously. And I think that happiness will ultimately come in the form of raising a family in the gospel. As long as I can live comfortably and provide for them, will I really need much else? I don't think so. Does it take a big, prestigious school to get me there? I mean it can't hurt... But not necessarily. So that's not to say I don't have big goals anymore, but I do think it's important to keep our eyes on the big picture and who we want to become when we're making plans, goals, and decisions about the future.

...so how does this all relate to my purpose in setting up this blog? Well, the person C I've envisioned doesn't waste as much time on social media as person A did, yet I keep finding myself mindlessly scrolling through newsfeeds. I wonder if this is how drug addicts feel... Haibo. But anyway, since person B loved writing his weekly letters home so much, why not keep that habit alive? That's kinda the thought that came to me yesterday. Call it serendipity if you'd like, but I'd like to call it inspired, so we're gonna roll with this for a while and see what happens. I've set some goals for myself to cut back on social media, and uh, we'll see how it goes! I'll probably cave a few times before kicking the habit for good, but hey... Isn't that kinda why Christ suffered for us? Give us a chance to get things right the second time (or third, or fourth, or however many times we need) as long as we're genuinely trying to be better?

Anyway, I should probably bounce for the day. Going on our first family drive in two years. More rambling coming your way next week. I'll try and figure out how to get pictures on here too. Hmmm...

Sala kahle, stay positive, and love your lives my friends.

Much love and aloha!

Dizzy
(That's what my dad's called me for years... And it fit best with the Arrested Development logo I ripped off, so...)